We barely spoke aside from saying how horrible we felt for Belinda, as well as a few choice words about Bruce. Finally, Belinda re-emerged. This tim... she was carrying two full wine bottles. They had both been uncorked. She climbed back into the hot tub and took a chug from one of the open bottles and handed the other to me. Her cheeks were dry and she no longer looked sad, though her eyes were red and puffy. At that moment, she only looked enraged."Got a text from Melissa." she said in a. It makes no sense when some people speak as though oral sex isn’t “having sex”; of course it is, just as is anal sex. The anus has more nerve endings than the vagina, so enormous pleasure is possible, far more than you can ever experience as a man.I had to come to terms with myself. I had accepted what I was, what I needed and what I wanted, and I was determined to fulfill all, not just some, of my desires. I had longed for this sort of sordid, risque, uninhibited sex. Why had I denied myself. She tried giving me head and even allowed me to watch her play with her favorite vibrator but it was no use. We have always enjoyed Andrea having sex outside of our marriage and we even played with chastity devices on me. This gave Andrea the idea to have fun with my new impatient condition. Saturday afternoon she invited Tim to come over for some sex. She greeted him at the door wearing only a bikini bottom, she had been tanning by the pool topless. She told him that my dick didn't work and. I feel horrible, like I've done something wrong, like I'm a horrible human being. I went onto the internet at one point and started looking things up and now I feel even worse. You would think that we are the scum of the universe by the way everyone talks. Darkness falls around me,love is the forbidden sin,alone I face my shame,forgotten I face the darkness. September 14th Yes, I know. I was pathetic yesterday. Poor pitiful Cindy. Don’t get me wrong Diary, I love you, you were there for me.