But tell him I didn't mean it -- I didn't want him to hate me, OK?____________________________________________________________________________________...___________________Sunday, May 11th (night)Hi, MikeGeezz!!! Categorical imperatives, Phenomenology, Epistemology??? All inone letter? You're trying to make my brain pop, right??Is this like your way to say you're not mad, and we can talk aboutsomething else?? OK. But a different something else, PLEASE!!! And if amurder is looking for me -- LIE!!. She looked me up and down and I thought she was going to yell"It's a boy in girl's clothes" but nothing happened. A few seconds latera taxi came along and Auntie waved him down and we climbed in. "Where toladies?" asked the driver and Auntie whispered to me, "You tell him." Inearly died on the spot. "16 Preston Road, please," I said. "OK, Miss,no problem." "See, that wasn't so hard, was it?" whispered Auntie again.I shook my head. The journey lasted about ten minutes and the driverdidn't laugh. After I had checked and chatted with a few friends, I became bored and not noticing how much vodka I had drunk whilst chatting I decided to have a look at what mother had on her computer. I admit I was drunk and still angry or I would never had been so nosey. Much of it was normal stuff people kept on their pc, family pics etc. But hidden inside a folder was another folder labelled my stuff when I clicked on this I opened a Pandoras box of my mothers inner most thoughts and desires. Never would. I had chosen this instead. It was my lot, and I had to live with it. I was able to see that Julia bought a bra, and then she walked out of my life forever.Why I saw her so seldom, and never saw her again, I often wondered in the so very long, lonely hours that were left to me. Had she moved away and these were just return visits? Had I hurt her so much she could only bear to return occasionally? I would never know. I never did get to know what became of her, or of her son, or of the man who had.