I caught her fingers and kissed each of her fingertips before sucking each of her fingers. She closed her eyes and let out a deep sigh as I kissed the...inside of her palms, the inside of her elbows….. her collarbones.The bronzed beauty before me elevated my own need to levels bordering physical pain. But more than that, I desired to watch ecstasy bloom through her face and to watch her iris become drunk with passion and so with immense control I reigned in the hurricane inside. While I sucked at. .. I mean, I was her personal assistant. I've been with her for almost ten years.”“And did you get along?”“Yes, of course. We were friends.”“Tell me why you were here at the Darella.”“For a concert. She has a new album coming out, so... It was a PR gig for the release.”“Is it any good?”“Excuse me?”“Her new album. Is it any good?”She stares at me for a while, and then shakes her head. “Not really.”“Where you and Miss Doll lovers, Mona?”Her jaw drops.“Excuse me??”“Are you a lesbian, Miss Sands?. The thing was, and I had never hidden this from anyone, I thought my future was with Birgit. I knew that it was something of a pipe dream in some ways, but no more so than what Becky was thinking. So I couldn’t fault her for that. The key difference was that Birgit and I both wanted the same thing. Becky and I didn’t; at least not at this point.Could I see myself with her for the rest of my life? Yes. Did I think it was going to happen? No. And the answer was ‘no’ because of Birgit. Without. .. I am not so sure. I have been reading these entries for a few days, looking at how my attitude changed and I think we all may be rather fucked up mentally. I don't know what I can do, except possibly talk Dr Grant around, he is a rational man and he should understand that what he is doing is irrational. 18th Log A.T,Dr Grant may be more screwed up than I thought. I brought up the question of our actions and all he responded with was accusations about my loyalty to him. Simon was there to.