To wish is to invite ill luck. Instead, like Mom, I pray and accept, pray for more luck but also accept God, even in God’s strange ways.Despite a li...e of adultery, I raised children, happy, successful ones and helped them raise theirs well too. None faced puberty alone nor were their minds scarred with visions of hell like mine. I’m happy with my little tribe.Fear constantly stalked me in the past. I changed from the girl who confidently wore the Saint Christopher’s medal and wanted to be a nun. Deb was sat on the top step and I was a few steps down leaning against the brick wall waiting for Gemma to bring the cold drinks up. We were looking up the garden at the progress we had made on the steps and hadn’t noticed Gemma on the steps behind us until she chinked the glasses together. Turning around I immediately noticed that my missus had taken off her little red top all together and was now just in her plain black bra with the straps tucked in the sides. Her boobs looked really big and. “And I look forward to when my fingers can again stroke and caress your ‘soft Kat's fur.’ Your fur looks wonderful, and feels even better against my fingers…and against my soldier. You’re on my mind and in my heart always and constantly….…even when you’re not impaling yourself on my sword, you’re always on my mind! - Your loving swordsman Cyrano” I replied: “My dear heart - I love the image your words evoke, of your fingers stroking something soft and making my kitten purr …... or is it that. You don't tell me what to do... I tell YOU what to do!"Janice backed away from her son quickly. "I... I'm sorry John... I didn't mean for it to sound like that... I was just trying to..." Shut UP!"Janice jumped at his words, and began to tremble slightly as John stared directly at her. "Listen very carefully to what I'm about to say mom, because I'm not going to repeat my self... You do what I say... when I say it, without question..."John stopped just then and looked down at the sheet his.