This one is compliments of Johnnymax, a contrast to the MS Windows joke. a variation came to mind.Wife texts husband on a beautiful day after a fruit ...icking weekend: "Apples driving me nuts, what to do."Husband texts back: "put in cider maker and crank up the pressure."Wife texts back 5 minutes later: "Computer gone flat now."These are compliments Bill LBritish humor as it used to be: absolutely politically incorrect.It has been announced that the police are going to be allowed to use water. I can tell you this, though, his cock was hard as a piece of rebar, and I hadn’t even touched it yet! I knelt between his knees, bent down and took him in my warm, wet mouth. I heard him moan in pleasure as I swirled my tongue around the head of his cock while I sucked it. His hands moved over my shoulders, caressing them, then they moved up the back of my neck and into my hair. He didn’t try to force my head down, he just ran his fingers lightly through my hair while I pleasured him. Chris. She had her hair flowing over her shoulders in what looked like a fashion model cut. She had on the nicest blue mini-dress with plunging neckline and wide white belt. I immediately noticed her absolutely fantastic legs which looked like they belonged on a girl much younger than her. She also had on blue heels to make her look absolutely perfect. She told me "come on in and have a seat. Would you like a drink?" I told her "Jack on the rocks if you have it." She said coming right up. Then I heard. He groaned loudly as he came, his body shaking, throbbing in her mouth for far too short a time. He realized with frustration that he had cum way too soon to suit him.Heather swallowed his seed and licked him clean. She looked up and smiled. "Don't worry, Richie," she said. "I know exactly how to get that nice cock all hard for me again."In the other bedroom, Melinda fought a battle of will with herself. She desperately tried not to have Jason touch her pussy.It was very difficult, for Jason.