" I had a feeling you'd say that." He smiled at me. “You know my girlfriend hates giving head..." he said, sliding a hand down to his crotch.My eyes...immediately followed his hand and I didn’t respond."So…” he went on, “that’s what I really need help with; I can’t handle all the blue balls..." He looked at me, but I couldn’t look up from his crotch where he was rubbing his hand slowly over an increasing bulge.I didn’t move. I was sitting in the Jeep of the coolest guy I knew, and he was openly. .. i looked over at Jason which had gotten his clothes pulled up and was zipping up his jacket (i guess to hide the cum riddled shirt.)"what should i do man..." i whispered nervously. "See who it is and what they want!" Jason answered swiftly. I looked down as i lowered my driver side window... I waited to hear something and did not. so after not hearing anything and giving a side glance to Jason (who motioned with his lips) "see what HE wants".......i looked up and the beaming flashlight. A man dies ‘in the act’ after taking Viagra and rigor mortis has set into his private parts.The funeral director can’t get the coffin lid nailed on and has to discuss the alternatives with the man’s beautiful young widow. “I’m afraid that the only way to get the lid on is either to pay another $3,000 for an extra-large coffin or to amputate his member”.“Well I have no more money” states the widow “and it is against my religion for me to bury my husband in more than one piece”.The funeral. "I stood panting, my loins on fire, wondering what to do next. Chrissy lay impaled, flattened against the black metal, writhing slowly."My handbag strap comes off."I'd though her silly to have a broad, long strap on such a small bag, but now I understood. Folded in two, the soft leather reeked of punishment and power.Chrissy screamed."I'm sorry!" I bent to kiss the bright red weal. "Your bum's so small it's difficult to hit it with the flat." Go on. It's perfect. I like to scream." Her bottom.