But she took the clams and attached them as far up my shaft as they would go...so that as I got even harder, they pulled and pinched my tender skin al... the more. Then she looked me in the eyes: "I would normally gag my slaves, but I really want to hear your screams of torment and cries for mercy."Suddenly, she brought the whip down repeatedly on my dick. It hurt more than anything yet and I really yelled out for the first time. She did this a number of times, intermittently lifting my hard. Olga with a jealous voice tone;-Did you hear that Natalie??Natalie;-Yes I heard !And Natalie puts her hands around her waist, pretending to be sarcastic and a little angry;-I hope you don't mean I'm fat ??And with a lustful look at Natalie's fuller legs, I said;-I can die for your ful legs NatalieAnd Olga is jealous and with a very pranky voice tone;-Lucky you !And, Natalie pulled her skirt up and with a sarcastic voice tone asked;- Will you be able to do them? (she was meaning if I can fuck. In a joking voice, she told Reg that she had to get going so that she could get ready for her ‘alternate arrangements’ for that night. Reg groaned and promised to make up for their lost evening of sex on Wednesday. Cyndi assured him that she’d find some way to satisfy her desires, even if she had to ‘help’ herself. As she drove home, Cyndi tried to decide what to wear for Sean. After taking a shower to freshen up, Cyndi picked out a brown suede skirt that was cut about 6′ above her knee, an. So, here I am without something to believe in when, apparently, I need something. I’ve thought about medication for anxiety. I’ve talked to my doctor and read through the effects and side-effects. I don’t think meds are the answer. It’s the worst at night. I go to bed, feeling very peaceful, and then something happens to trigger thoughts of death in my mind and if I’m lucky, I can get rid of them. Other nights, they stay there at the front of my mind, so that no matter what I think about or if.