As Mr. Labatt dug into the front pocket of his tailored business suite’s trousers, he smiled over at Eda and motioned for her to come over to the ta...le. E bounced over to Sammy’s parents and clapped her hands in glee as Mr. Labatt held up a ‘purple and silver’ colored Time Bandettes’ credit card in his right hand. Sammy’s dad then said, “I’ve been meaning to give this to you since your sixteenth birthday, Eda, but it seems like every time I’ve seen you, something else has been going on in our. . i was exspecting a ankle bracelett or a viabrator .. what the heck was this !!! When i reached my house i stashed the bag in the wheelie bin and crept upstairs to bed..I hardly slept.. tossing and turning all night thinking about my pictures online and what on earth might be in that bag.. i woke up swollen and wet. I was so frustrated i couldnt wait to get started so i ushered everybody out of the house as quickly as i could before running out to the wheelie bin, retreiving the mystery bag. ' If no, press 'two.'"I pressed the 'one.' And the computer immediately came back with,"Please press the number on your touch-tone phone that corresponds withthe number of children you have under the age of 18."I went ahead and hit the 'three' button.The computer came back at me with, "Now we understand that this is asensitive issue for many but it is strictly for statistical purposes. Wewould like to know your ethnic background. If you are White press 'one.'If you are African American press. The telephone conversation between the two women went on to other things but as the chat was winding down Christine asked, "When did you last have a good shag, Val?" What, oh I don't know, when did you?" replied Valerie who was actually blushing on the other end of the phone."Shit, I suppose about two months ago," responded Christine."I think I must be closer to two years," replied Val somewhat wistfully."There you are then, bed the hunky waiter," said her friend although Christine knew that.