Just another sign of depression. But it doesn't just speak in your low moments, it's always there in your highest points. When you graduate, when you'...e promoted, when you feel love for your partner."You could do so much better."It affects you, you know for a fact it does. Your relationships fail, you can't hold onto your jobs, your pursuits result in nothing. You believe it, it bothers you. You know it's correct but in a way that you can't describe. Days of failure slide into months which. That can’t be it but I had to know. The whole time driving there my mind wandered and I was betting myself that she would not be there, this was a waste of time. She was probably in some swanky hotel with some guy fucking his brains out. I pulled onto the road and found run down vacant houses on both sides, only a few with for sale signs. Some were occupied as kids were playing in the roadway and in vacant lots. Then halfway down the street I saw Jen car parked in a driveway. Parking out. Bye, Holly.’ I haul my fatigued body through my front door at exactly five-thirty that evening with just enough time to hop in the shower and run out the door to class. It has been one hell of a day. The loan officer, Mr. Faraday, was ruthless. He went over our business plan with a fine-toothed comb. The man picked out every tiny detail, asked us a hundred questions about each one, and told us exactly where we had gone wrong. After two hours of sitting in hard plastic visitors’ chairs, Mr.. If you don’t go back and sit at your booth, I am going to throw you off this train!”She finally looked at the conductor. He must have been six and a half feet tall and weighed 400 pounds easy, with not much of that fat. Although he was clearly an old man, he looked like he could throw both her and her husband about 100 yards off the train. He was clearly enraged, she noted. And his hands were balled into fists, which she estimated to be larger than her head.Knowing she had been beat for now,.