A few days later, after all the homework and projects were laid out, I scanned the internet searching for men that looked like him. Apparently I didn...t have to look that far when it comes to the internet; the bear community is rampant with bear love, hairy chests, arms and faces, giving lovingly bear hugs to all their bear comrades. What I was afraid of was that they may never accept me because I wasn't hairy enough, or tall enough, or big enough to find a bearish man. Then coupled with this. Later. Maybe.”And we spoke of other things.This day she has shown me a thing that sits on a wall of the room where we spend our days. It is like the box on the table, which she calls computer, but bigger and different. She says the name is television, or teevee, and she shows how it, too, lights up when she takes up a small thing and presses a boss on it.“I don’t usually watch, but it’s time for the news and I have no idea what’s happening in the world,” she tells me. I ask what is news, and. He looks like the mailman, we think. He’s just like me, a real geek. Lizzie looks just like all the women in her mom’s family, which means that she’s got it up here now, but ten years from now, it’ll be all down here.” He gestured with his hands moving them from his chest to his waist. “She’s a class A goof,” he said with a smile.“Have you told them anything about me?” she asked.Sam shook his head. “I don’t see Sammy except at breaks, but I don’t really know how to even bring up the subject. I. Okay it was a bit boring but it was normal and comfortable.Now! Now my life was soo different, so uncertain, so unpredictable, so embarrassing, so dangerous, and soo humiliating. I feel like I had no choice other than to give myself to Tony. Give every aspect of my life and my body to him to control as he sees fit.Why had I let him convince me that signing that damn contract was a good thing? Why hadn’t I asked for a 14 day cooling off period? Why had I thought that signing it was a good thing?.