"Dad! Dad! I think that old raccoon's gotten in the garage again. There's a helluva lot of banging going on out there."About the only thing that pisse... him off more than his daughter being such a goddamn slut was that fucking raccoon getting in the garage and tearing through the garbage cans. That news'd get him from dead drunk asleep to shot-gun mad in two seconds flat!But then I got a better idea. I stepped into the kitchen. Eve just about had a heart attack trying to pretend she hadn't been. There was a big picture window at the back of the house where I could see from the hot tub straight through the house to the front door. I jumped in the tub and turned on the jets. I loved the way the jets would blow against my asshole. I was well loosened up and began to fuck my ass with a thick dildo. This was one that just made me cum over and over. When I say cum, I mean pure anal orgasms, not ejaculation. If you have never had one they are incredible. A full body orgasm and at an endless. Thinking about those little girls, yeah I guess I would. I did look back at her, "But thank you." Maybe I should apologize too," Eve said slowly. "I wasn't thinking. I'm sorry I called you a murderer." You could have knocked me over with a feather: the ice-bitch apologizing?"That's okay, I understand why you'd think so," was all I could say. Luckily we were interrupted by Sharon announcing that a message had arrived from earth. It was too soon for a reply from our latest ones so it had to have. A man walked into an agent’s office for an audition, as he had a strong desire to be an actor.He acted, he sang, he danced, he told jokes, and did pratfalls, after which the agent said.“You’ve got a lot of talent. Whats your name?”“Penis Van Lesbian, Sir.”“Excuse me? What did you say?”“Penis Van Lesbian”“You CAN’T have a name like THAT in show business.” The agent replied.“Penis Van Lesbian is a long respected name where I come from, and I will NOT change it!” As he stormed out the door in a.