I can't take my eyes off it. You do as you are told, and stand with your back against the tree, not knowing whats next. I reach into my bag and pull o...t those velvet handcuffs you bought us. I know how you like the feel of them. I take your arms and cuff them round the tree, its comfortable. We kiss, gently, then hungrily. I press myself against you to feel your hardness and I want you so bad.. but I cant. We have to wait. Hearing her car pull up, her car door shut I reach into my bag again and. She was going to bring Phil home for Christmas.I got a nice card from Erin for Thanksgiving. She offered condolences again for Clara and hoped I'd recovered okay. Cindy sent me a Christmas card that was funny with all of her goings on. I wasn't looking forward to Christmas — that was always a special time of year for Clara and I. Mandy and Phil came and the house was filled with light again. I hadn't done the tree so she got after me for that. The more I saw of Phil, the more I liked him. He. But I feel I'm letting you down. After all it was me who suggested making love tonight, having put pressure on you before, and now I duck out. And that's what makes me unhappy. I feel I've let you down." No, my sweet. You haven't. You just aren't ready to go the whole way, even though a lot of you wants to. I'm not going to hold that against you. As I said I respect you for it. So, just be happy and don't get yourself in a tizz about it. I can live without making love to you for the time being. ”Brenda fixed her Aunt a beer, and they all sat to eat. John again bowed his head in silent thanks for the wonderful meal, and even more, for the wonderful friends. After observing his ritual Warden Saunders asked, “John, are you a religious person?”“I don’t know. I was raised to believe there was a God, but I’ve trouble understanding how a loving God could take my parents like he did, or allow me to be setup for crimes I didn’t commit, and ending up in here.”Brenda said, “But, if you’d not.