I'm sorry."Totally contrite, "I ruined everything. You didn't do anything." I pushed you to perform." Oh, OK.... I went to a psychiatrist." Really!" H...'s actually nice. I can talk about stuff that I can't talk about with anybody else." Oh, Sean helps me." He wants you to come with me one time." Ya think." Alex, I miss you so much." Me too." Fighting tears, "But I'm really mad at you. I don't even know what you did. I don't wanna know." I'm mad at me too. I wanna die. Just zap me." Logan, don't. I knew she’d argue with me about it since she made twice what I did, but I would not give in. I had something special planned that she knew not of. Oh yeah, this was going to be one big ass night for sure.“Okay, but no arguing with me about who’s paying; it’ll be me. Got it,” I said, in my bossiest tone of voice. She did actually look a little irritated that she hadn’t at least gotten her side of the argument on the record.“Okay, but the next one’s on me. I don’t care if it’s a pizza party in. Well ... sorry, Colleen...”“I guess I can see what you are doing. Were you jerking off watching me?”“No, I was ... ah ... I was ... well, I guess...” I was still incoherent and embarrassed, and I started to tuck my prick back into my swimsuit.“Hold it right there! Leave your boner out until we settle this!”I don’t think Colleen knew what she wanted to do right then, but just needed a few moments to think things through. “But grab that towel and wipe up your mess!” I grabbed a towel, wiped up. “You say that word so easily.”“What? God?” He watched her flinch, then reluctantly nodded. “It’s not a magic word, Karen. It isn’t even a real name. According to Jewish tradition, it’s actually...”“Don’t say it!” she cried.He held up a hand in a peace gesture. “Alright, I won’t, but there is nothing to be frightened of. You could say it too, you know. Words only have power over you if you let them.”“We cannot.” Karen shook her head, sending her bangs to fall around her face like a curtain.“Why.