" "Number two would be that you could strip for me every once in awhile." "The best way though, is for us to have sex," I explained. She was amazed ho... much research I did on this. Then, she asked, "So what if we have sex, will that get rid of this for good?" "No," I said. "It's gotta happen at least once a month," I lied. "So with all this said, I want to know... If I can have sex with you?" We sat there for a few minutes until I heard her say, "Okay." "What?" I asked, surprised by what I just. “I’m ready, take me."He looked nervous."Never done this, have you?”Guys love to think they’re number one. I was virtually virginal, this was my first sex untainted by coercion or commerce. I nodded.“Waiting for the perfect man.”“Don’t want to hurt you.”“Start slow, see if I can handle it." I’ll try.”I closed my eyes and controlled my breath."OK, go."I blinked away blinding pain, breathed rhythmically, then a napalm blast erupted and engulfed me, incinerating my masculinity, scorching away the. With her heart pounding she managed to flash a quick smile and turn back to the conversation with her friends. Her glass was empty so she summoned a waiter who carried a silver tray full of drinks. When she turned toward the waiter she, once again, caught the man gazing at her with an appreciative, almost admiring smile on his gorgeous face. It seemed surreal for her that such a man should be looking at her but she didn't dare look behind her to check if there was someone else who was the. When he was with his family there was a veneer of joviality, no hint of inner pain. For the first time I was wondering how much damage had been done to him emotionally.There were a couple of times when we sat in complete silence for hours, me typing, Marco staring at the wall.There were also good days. He wasn’t in his room when I arrived early one evening. A nurse told me that he was in the pediatric ward working with some children. After walking over, I stood at the doorway watching,.