One day I walked into hisoffice and said, "I have some good news!" I wanted to tell him about apat on the back our boss had given me."You're pregnant..." he said. He was always making gay jokes like thatabout me, because even though I'm all man, I'm a small person, more thesize of an average slender woman than a guy.But I didn't mind his teasing that much. He thought he was funny, andhe was a good friend in many ways. So I answered, "No! I don't evenhave a boyfriend!"He laughed and laughed,. From my earliest memories, I had alwaysfelt like there was something wrong with me. When I saw little boys andlittle girls playing, I felt deep in my heart that I should be playingwith the "other" girls. I knew that I looked like a boy, and wasexpected to act like a boy but inside I knew with all certainly that Iwas a little girl. When I was around eight or nine years old, I stolesome of my mother?s lingerie from the hamper and wore them under myclothes all day. The euphoria that I felt was. Some agents just looked at the commission and sold the policies that made them the most money. I was brought up to try and do the right thing. I’ve sowed my wild oats in college and have been thinking about finding the right woman, settling down and starting a family. My mom always asked me when I was going to settle down, I was an only child. I’ve dated a few women in the last couple of years but even though the sex was good I didn’t love them. Also, so many women are divorced out there and I. . regular.It used to be worse - before I started taking hormones, I could hardlystand to look at myself even dressed, but with my breasts coming in alittle, now if I wear the right kind of clothes I guess there are worselooking women out there.But naked, all I see is the ugly bits, so I just dont go there.I know I shouldnt complain - I've seen some people who have it a lotrougher than me in the looks department - burn victims, people withhorrible diseases, people with terrible birth defects.Me,.