I am a forty-year-old former Naval Officer, and I am stronger than this. I just need some time to be alone for a while. I'll keep writing in here, tho...gh because this does make me feel better.Nobody want's to hear me go on and on about the past. I can deal with her loss by myself. I'm just glad the kids aren't here to see me.Journal Entry Number Eight:Something's off, and I'm starting to get weirded out. The bright light I keep seeing is getting harsher, and I'm still having serious migraines.. She said the nightgown; the sheer one with the almost non existent robe should turn myman on. She treated me as of I really was her daughter, I loved her so foraccepting me; I wished my dad would. I forgave him for the way hetreated me, if I could only get him to understand, my being this waywas not a choice; it is a hand I was dealt and I had to play it.Mom did promise she would do all she could to get dad to accept me as Iwas, not as he wanted me to be. I could accept his not wanting to see. I followed him out to the back of the house and sat outside by the pool. The three of us had another drink he prepared and the older man then asked if I had any problem with him going nude as they liked to stay naked when by the pool. I thought it was odd, but I just told him that it was fine with me. He went back in the house and came out totally naked.I noticed he was completely shaved smooth and his cock hung down about 5 inches and it was still soft. His ball sack was shaved as well and I. ”I knew that he had just insulted my manhood, but I couldn’t do anything about it. I finally looked back up at him when he told me, “Hey boy look up here in my eyes. From now on I’m going to tell you what to do and you are going to do whatever I tell you. You understand boy?” I was looking right into his eyes and I could hear myself answer, “Yes Sir!”He announced to Deena, “I know what he can do to prove that he isn’t lying, he could suck my cock until it was hard so we could fuck, I mean it is.