“It’s not like it kills me,” I tell him. “It just weakens me for a year or two.” “That’s not why I don’t want it,” he tells me. “I...want to try spending my forever with you.” He doesn’t look at me when he says it; he just stares into the night. He’s let his wall down like I taught him, and I know he’s scared that I won’t say the same. “I can’t guarantee anything,” I tell him. “Your decision might change a century from now, or a decade from now. You have to make your decision before you let go. I decided cheer leading wasn't for me. Come to think of it, I never really thought it was. I just did it because my best buddy did.I've taken a good look at myself over the past nine months. I respect myself a lot more than I did back then. I can honestly say I was in love with the idea of being in love. I was in the middle of a situation of no substance trying to make it into a Hollywood love story.I found I'm a good person. An effective person. Every once in a while I'll spot something that's. Quickly, insome nervous excitement she pulled the tape off the top and got itopen. It was full of clothes all packed in plastic bags and baggedagain in groups including underwear. There was a bag of bras, panties,suspender belts, stockings, blouses or tops and skirts. The blouseswere coloured either white, red or black, the material sheer and thin.The skirts were red or black, the underwear red or black and thestockings black. The bras were 2 different types in each colour, eithera translucent. After a couple of hours, the group feasted on her clootie dumpling and brandy custard. All too soon the moon began to show its face through the clouds and it was time for Kara’s parents to return home. They left with a promise of returning for Hogmanay (New Year’s Eve), the next weekend.Duncan had already retreated to his room to play his new PS3 games as Scott and Kara stood in the doorway, waving to her parents until they could no longer see the lights of their car. Kara turned to step inside.