Half was woman, long flowing hair, a large perky breast, thin, trim leg, and if only that half was viewed, she would be completely drop dead gorgeous....And as beautiful as the right half of her was, the left half was just as handsome. His hair was trimmed short, a mustache only took up the left side of his face, his arm and leg were muscular.He/she was wearing a tight piece of clothing, leaving all limbs exposed, half was sparkly and feminine and half was black and manly. "Now honey, aren't you. Therefore, youare enjoined to hold yourself in readinessfor any and all commands we might have,and to appear at the spring ball.By decree,Ulstead 1stJohn read and reread the letter, which was a politely worded command to appear at court and also to attend a ball of some sort. This was totally unexpected. He considered his options, and sent for Cal."You sent for me my lord?" Cal asked when he arrived in the den."Read this, and tell me your thoughts," John said, handing over the invitation.Cal. "What was it you called me again?" Emphasizing each word with the tap of her crop on his chin. "Oh yes, that's right. You called me a bitch. A bitch, A Bitch!" tapping harder with each consecutive expletive."You thought you could come into my home. Get your jollies off. Use me for your perverted little fantasies. Yet still retain total control. You thought you could call me a bitch. Order me around like all the frightened little people who scurry around your existence. But you can't. You can't. Did you see camels playing soccer on the street in front of your house?”“No, it was even funnier than that. My mom said that I had a doctor’s appointment with her OB/Gyn on Monday.”“If there had been monkeys riding on the camels, would that have made it funnier than a doctor’s appointment?”“Jake, you insensitive clod, don’t you know why a girl goes to see an Ob/Gyn?”“You don’t look pregnant to me so I’m guessing it’s not the obstetrics part. So, it must be that your gynoscope is malfunctioning..