I've told you a thousand times I let your mother down very badly and I don't think she will ever be able to forgive me for doing that." But I'm sure t...at Mother does love you, Dad." Even if she does Bridget, love isn't everything. You have to have trust and I destroyed any trust your mother had in me many years ago." I'm going to talk to Mother," Bridget announced and left me alone with all the half-eaten meals.I'd lost my appetite as well, so I cleared away the dishes and washed up. Then I. “I won’t often give it, but this one night, I’ll allow you to pleasure yourself. I want you to acknowledge that it is only because I’ve given you my permission, that you may do this.”Susan answered, “I understand, and I do thank you for allowing me to do this,” she said.“I will leave you to your business,” he said then added, “Goodnight.” and he hung up. Susan stopped the video and removed it from the dvd player. She shut off the television, and the lights in her living room, carrying the dvd. ”Ginnie sat there, her tea forgotten.I could feel my old brain struggling for control. “And I think I somehow betrayed her when we were in the DDR.” My voice betrayed the anguish I was feeling.“Betrayed her? How?” I could hear the disbelief in her voice.I shook my head. “I don’t know – I’ve been over everything we did, everything I talked about and I can’t think of anything ... except...” I dribbled to a halt, my throat constricting.Ginnie stroked my hand. “Except?”“At the opera reception, do. There was some livestock to feed and water morning and evening, but the main part of the day was mine to fill. There was only so much daytime TV I could stomach, and there was kind of a limit to how many times a day I could wank To help pass the time every other day or so I would walk down to the village- maybe buy some bread or milk or whatever.Around this time my tights fetish was near it's zenith. I was in the habit of going for walks wearing a pair of (more or less) opaque tights. I would.