When I should've felt the least macho Iinstead felt like John Wayne and Rambo rolled into one. Maybe because,like a deer stunned in a car's headlights... it was so damn easy toforget real things.The expression on Julie Ann's face. You can't describe it, it looked somovie star awesome, her hazel eyes so wide and dewy sparkling lookingup at me like she was gawking me all aglow in wonder and praise, almostlike a princess rescued by a knight. That face made my year because Ialso knew I didn't just. He passed me again - stopped in front of the door and locked it. I looked confused up to him. He looked pale and scarred at me. I gave him another cute smile to make him feel safer. He lost some of the tense, but kept standing steady in my way. "What do you do with a gun?" he only asked. I set down my bag and suitcase, which for some reason started to be very heavy. I felt how I weak I was in his presence. I acted like a teenager - not really - I just acted normal for my age. I lost my coolness. Nothing to worry about," I said."I can give you a massage," he offered. I saw "desire" in his eyes. He probably saw it in mine, too.I stood up and brushed the thought aside. "I'm fine, thanks. This is nothing." I stood up and went to the living room. Sat on the sofa and picked up a box, opened it, just to diffuse the "heat" between us. The box had some of my old books and pictures. The next thing I knew, we were both looking at old pictures and sharing stories about my c***dhood.We were seated. "I thought you might find her interesting. If you don't mind I'll seat you next to her tonight. She will be playing to you anyway, so we might as well make it easy on her. By the way, are you a meat eater or a vegetarian?"I said "Why, it doesn't matter. Whatever the family eats will be fine." Our family has a divide. Andrew eats meat when he can. And if Jake is here he has an excuse. So when he makes dinner on tennis night, those two always have meat."I was surprised. "Andrew makes dinner on.