I opened my mouth to protest yet again, but no words came out. Perhaps it was because of the fear that gripped me. Or maybe it was the arousal that ha... now invaded my body. Or perhaps it was the reminder than I had to do everything my cousin asked, no matter how perverse. In the end the reason mattered little. The point is that I ignored my brain’s warnings and instead focused on my body’s desires.“Fuck!” I yelped as Alec’s tongue slid into me. Or maybe it was a moan. I couldn’t tell. I guess. Onday, October 8, 1979Missy, Jude and I were in deep rapport the next morning when Beth surprised us by coming in and joining us. She sat on the loveseat across from us and waited for us to realize she was there. I said. she laughed. Sharon went out to buzz Sarah in at the gate and in a few minutes they came out to the deck where we were relaxing. Sarah looked at least ten years younger and I told her so. Ken said. Sharon asked. Ken said. Bonnie said. I said and everyone else agreed. Tim. But some things are meant to happen; this was one of those things.One chilly fall afternoon is when my dreams and I believe his, came true. The leaves had just changed to somber colors of orange, yellow, and red. The air became crisper making people long for companionship and someone to keep them warm. It was nearing five and I had just finished cheerleading practice. I headed to his room to do a lab I had missed a few days prior.This wasn’t planned. I did not deviously concoct a plan to seduce. There are hundreds of actresses at my level. I was the middle-management of actresses.One day my agent had the paperwork for my Screen and Stage Actors' Guild card, and she told me I had to pretty much decide who I wanted to be for the rest of my life. Fuck. The rest of my life. No pressure.She said that I was going to have to lose 'Lucy.' Too many associations. "You're not a comedienne. You're not funny. Don't let it go there."I was in the middle of an off-off-Broadway production of Othello,.