"We'll leave you two to it then," Dad said. "Make sure you have him homeno later than 10 Emily," my mother said sternly. "Yes ma'am," Emilyreplied. We...waited until they had left the room and then Emily said,"Shall we go then?" She offered her arm. I nodded shyly and took her arm.I towered over her but I felt safe clinging to her arm.Emily was a year older than me at 17 and she had passed her driving testand had her own car which she used to pick me up. Emily opened thepassenger door for me and. Since Sharon's gifts are in their garage, I will do her last. Boy, would I like to do her. So, starting at the far corner, carrying my large red velvet bag, I headed to Dave's house to gift his gorgeous wife. As I headed toward the back door, I heard a giggle. There sitting on the back steps were the twins. They were drunk and shushed me repeatedly, "can't wake up momma — be very quiet Santa. We just need a little help, Gram has gone to the 24 hour drugstore to get her prescription and we left. Nothing else." I paused to let that sink in.The faces in front of me showed that they were starting to get some idea of what was coming.Or they thought they did. The truth was going to shock them.I continued. "Those of you aware of British military history will recognize Cromwell as the term used for the invasion of the country. I tell you this in all classified humor. The people responsible for this scenario have seen too many alien invasion movies."Not so much as a smirk. I was. She knew that only a few scant inches above the hem was the secret territory of her French undies and the perfumed feminine folds that helped her to afford her expensive lifestyle. She might be basically clueless when it came to current affairs or other mundane facts of life but she knew her income depended on her alertness in spreading her legs at the right moment and reaching a happy ending with a new-found ass-hole buddy sooner rather than later.That was her simple business model and it had.