I’m a rational human, but prefer honesty.
Me: Ugh. Yes, I pulled them out of your bag.
Jess: *slightly smiling* I think this is weird, but I lov... ya to death and it doesn’t really bother me.
Me: I’m so sorry. 
Jess: I also noticed you staring down my shorts. 
Me: It’s hard not to stare when it’s right there.
Jess: By IT, do you mean my pussy? Listen, I’ve checked you out a lot in the past, just don’t be so blatant. 
Me: You’ve what? Me?
Jess: I actually think it’s kind of hot you stole my. Something was going to happen, but I needed to plan it through.But I’d let the genie out of the bottle, and she wasn’t going to let it go at that. Now it was her turn to need information.“Why are you asking?”“I was just wondering.”“Why were you wondering?”I was tired. My eyes felt gritty and my face and hands felt grimy. I decided to take a shower, but she wasn’t going to let it go.“Rob, why were you wondering about something I do regularly? Honey, please tell me if something happened. It. You had to have extra money to go to the bar. I had to have money this winter for FOOD! Picking up on the job site got me scraps of lumber I could burn to cook my supper and heat some water to wash with when I ran out of propane three days before payday. I probably would have frozen to death that following winter if it hadn’t been for cell phones. My little piece of hillside turned out to be a pretty good spot for a tower. We haggled a bit on price and then I let them have it, I would back down. It had to be a lantern of some sort. Trudging on, I was soaking wet, exhausted, hungry, and starting to shiver from the coolness of the September rain storm. Finally, a half an hour later, I reached a clearing that revealed a small cabin and with another flash of lightning, I could see that it was at the edge of a lake. The window was glowing brightly with a fire that had smoke billowing from the small chimney. I almost cried with the sense of relief I had in making it to someone who could.