It was just that theywere now a part of me and my relationship with her. It was a presencethere somewhere behind me infusing my sub-conscious and warm...ng ever sofaintly my groin. Because it was not conscious I could not banish itfrom my thoughts. It wasn't in my thoughts so how could I get it out ofmy thoughts. I can say this now because I am looking back on it. But atthe time I was happy and go lucky. Hell I still am. It's just that ...--------... that my surprise was genuine when she. Harper’s hands behind his head that held him tight said she wanted exactly what he was doing.After a moment or two Julian stood up and they kissed. It was a long kiss. I couldn’t see exactly from where I was but Julian appeared to be hard. And why wouldn’t he be hard, kissing Harper. I was hard watching them. I saw Harper pat the side of the hot tub where the deck was flush with the edge. Julian shifted over and spread his legs, and Harper knelt in front of him.I could only see Harper’s broad. The deeper satisfaction I really needed wasn’t there. I talked with some of the happier older women to figure it out. They helped me understand that I was really looking for a total experiences, not just physical.“One woman, who everyone addressed as ‘Mother’ because she was the matriarch of the group, led discussions with other women who were seeking answers like I was. Her life partner, ‘Father’, did the same for men. When she figured I had achieved enough understanding, she invited me to. I’d also been completely unsurprised when Cèlia didn’t bring a date. We had just finished our meal and were drinking coffee.“Your friend Mr. Shaughnessy is an interesting guy,” Vincent said. “And his business partner is really ex-KGB?”“Lieutenant Colonel Yekatarina Sergeyevna Anisimova, KGB, retired!” I grinned. “I first met her when she was a major. That was back in 1981 in Chicago, when she was in charge of a protection detail for some Russian friends of mine. I dated one of her charges for a.