“They hardly even noticed that part. Everyone figures it will be another one of them ‘it almost came true, but not quite’ kinds of things.”“...hen what are they mad about?” Cal demanded.“They’re not mad at all,” Millie said. “They just have to start thinkin’ about you as someone different than what you used to be, that’s all. You were one of them until yesterday. Now they have to get used to you bein’ different. Like I said, it’s on account of your bein’ on TV.”“But I’m no different. The TV was. It was very, very tightand held his CB closely to his crotch, although there was still a slightbulge. Mary got the tape and confirmed that it reduced his waistmeasurement by two inches. She told him to keep it on while she triedseveral bras using the breast forms which Betty Appleby had given him.Eventually she selected one and set about taking a full set ofmeasurements. "Pity your hips aren't a bit wider. We should use some pads really. Butthat is not bad for a start. About a size 18 - we get. I thought it would be justice for me to follow her,” I said quietly, starting it. “I know you’ve all said I shouldn’t feel that way, but it’s not that easy. It would be like telling a gay man that he should just stop being attracted to other men. In my head, I know that you think it’s silly for me to feel like this, but I can’t stop it. I killed that woman. I didn’t know her. I never even looked her in the eye. I ended her life without any of that and I owed her better than that. I can’t ever. He glanced into his mirror, rubbing his face with his right hand. He immediately decided he wasn’t shaving today. Rejoicing in his decision making process. Another benefit of the divorce, the sound of any criticisms ceased when she moved out. In his over 50 years of life, he had always thought of himself as being his own man. Not a tough guy or anything, far from it. But slowly, over the years, he felt his self esteem melt away. Looking back, he couldn’t point to any specific.