Well girl what are you going to do? I picked up some clothing to tidy it up and had a change of heart and kicked my trainers off, yes, I said to mysel..., almost as if I meant it! Putting on the last of the clothing I had on earlier I lightly applied some makeup, then I removed my one and only wig from it’s hiding place and popped it on. Checking myself in the full length mirror I blew myself a kiss for good luck and realised I was getting turned on by what I saw and probably the situation I was. I slipped out from under the covers and stood there gazing into his eyes. As I leaned in to give him a kiss, he grabbed me roughly by my arm and turned me around. He pushed me up tight against the wall and said ‘This is how it will be, you bitch. You always have been and you always will be. “Say it!’ I like it rough, so I decided to play along. I knew he would never really hurt me. I struggled to get free, but he was too strong for me. I felt his teeth bite into my shoulder. Not enough to hurt. I knew I wasn't a transsexual or at I didn't see myself losing my penisover this so that left me transgendered. or gender fluid. I likedgirls, mostly and I only said that because I had never seen a boy Iwanted to have sex with - yet. Transgendered didn't hold much of adefinition so I more or less ignored it but when one of the women askedshe was kind and curious."May I ask you something personal honey?" the elderly woman said as welaid out patterns with the instructor's guidance."Of course,". And now, you are an adult. And I live in Heaven and Hell at the same time. For no-one in the ‘normal’ world outside could ever begin to understand my forbidden, deep love for you, nor any of what has happened in recent times. You are so much like your mother, Alika. For me, you have become your mother, my wife. Your long slender body, your green eyes, your soft blond hair, your pale skin and flawless complexion. Your sparkling personality, your vivacity and all those qualities she had, are now.