" Kaila responded, moving to rummage through a bag."How about Egyptian Rat Fuck?" I offered, causing giggles throughout the house."Rat Screw." Kaila c...rrected me with a groan."Fuck." I countered, unwilling to concede the argument."Screw." FUCK!" SCREW!" She rolled her eyes at me, preparing for a long battle."How about Bullshit?" Helen interjected, pulling up a chair at the table."Bullshit works." I nodded, giving my wife a "this isn't over" look.We assembled at the four sides of the small. We’d been unexpectedly summoned to head office to explain discrepancies in the accounts. Normally, this would have waited for the monthly visit, but, apparently, the magnitude of this error had the potential to cost millions. So we’d raced to London immediately. After spending the best part of a day painstakingly picking through masses of paperwork and computer files, the “mistake” had been found. Thankfully, it was traced back to one of head office’s accountants. As I’d been on the rack for. Nowadays that's not even a problem anymore. But, today... today was a strange day. Today I heard a dark devious voice in my head. When I logged on to my news feed there was a National Geographic article named Gender Revolution about a trans girl named Avery. Avery is the first trans girl to ever appear on the cover of National Geographic. Avery was part of this new liberal movement of letting boys be girls as soon as they start to feel that way. Parents just say "sure, why not". They just. “You’re turtles? Oh my god, you're fucking turtles. But how, is this possible, this is so cool, how did this happen? I was saved by Turtles!” I say with absolute excitement, I jump up and down not believing how cool this is. All four are now standing in the light; they look at each other with confusion, though I can’t help but notice their eyes when I was jumping. Feeling self-conscious, I stop jumping and try to regain composure. The turtle in blue steps forward, “You're not scared of us? Not.