Clothing consistedof - ain't going to tell ya again.I drove the 30 miles to the starting point, parked my car - finisheddressing by putting on my tenn...s shoes and packing my heels. I thoughtI looked good, one final look in my magnifying mirror; then I was offup the trail and into the woods. I picked up my pack, slinging it ontomy back and almost went over again from being unbalanced. I may beunbalanced, mentally and emotionally - but I usually have an excellentsense of balance. Wonder how. His lonely moments grew bitter. The thoughts of suicide that had flitted at the edges of his consciousness grew more insistent, more real. Instead of vague fantasies about what it would be like when he was gone, instead of idly pondering who, if anyone, would sign the guest book at his funeral, he began to plan, to contemplate when and how.Jonathan chose as the date the eve of his fortieth birthday, the symbolic end of his youth. Really, the choice was made because the date was close at hand,. . . . . . “I wrap my arms around your waist from behind as you turn your head and our lips meet. I close my eyes and savor the taste and feel of your lips massaging mine. “Come on.” I take your hand and lead you over to a blanket, gentle breeze. Next to us is a battery operated radio and an ice bucket containing two bottles of KF beer. “This is a private beach a common friend of us owns,” I explain as we sit down next to each other on the blanket, “While the owner’s away on vacation he said we. But to my surprise no one came. I reached school but still there was no sign of him. I felt relieved and went to the staff room. Suddenly I got a sms on my phone from an unknown number. “Remove your undergarments in the loo and go for the class” I read and got afraid that he knew where I worked, but I had no options then to agree. So I went to the loo it was in the staff room and removed my undergarments and kept it above the window in such a way that no one can see it. I then took my phone to.