I’ve got an undervest that is padded to fill the valleys and give me just a little more breadth in the shoulders. Don’t forget the fingernails. I ...eep mine short anyway but make sure all signs of polish have been stripped away and the nails are dull, not shiny. Unless I get strip-searched, no one can tell they aren’t looking at a man. The final thing to add is just a hint of shadow around the cheeks. Even when a man is clean shaved, he normally has hair growing on his cheeks that affects the. You need to cool down.Besides, I owe you one for that outburst earlier. Ithink a trip downstairs for appropriate punishment isin order.” What he meant by this was that he wanted to take me tothe basement, where we have a private area set up thatwe used for our more imaginative sexual encounters, anduse me for his pleasures. I was tempted to argue withhim, but realizing he was right about my mood, and thethought of a little “tension relief,” made me concedeto his suggestion.. I was the editor of this ‘underground'(meaning we said ‘fuck’ in print) humor/satire rag called Rat Sass. It also probably didn’t hurt that they trusted me enough not to rat them out, or ‘eat the cheese’, as we termed it, if I got popped. And I wouldn’t have either. I guess it was sort an ‘honor among thieves’ sort of thing, although we weren’t thieves in any sense of the word. We were simply ‘wholesalers of illicit commodities’. Granted, it doesn’t look that hot on a resume, but it sounds much. My only solace was that she hadn’t just chucked me out. I knew then that she truly loved me. And that made it all worse, for I had seriously hurt her.When the email came in, I quickly scanned it. Oh, fuck!I read it again, more slowly, and if anything, it was worse. But I had no choice. I had fucked up, big time, I had wounded and embarrassed Her badly, and this was the only way I could ever crawl back into Her heart.I didn’t have the luxury of even hesitating if I wanted Her to continue to own.