I always felt a little disappointed. Aside from my fascination with the female body I never really felt physically or emotionally satisfied.The milita...y had filled a very large void in my life but there still was emptiness.I desperately wanted, what I have come to realize was almost totally absent in my childhood, a loving family. I was slow to mature. Even with my extensive experience in the military, living on the edge and exploring the world, I was still walking around with my mouth hanging. I didn't believe him."I was about to order pizza," I said, trying to find a way to keep him here; food usually worked. "You sure you can't hang around?" I'll be back in half an hour or so," he said. "If you want, I can pick it up after you order it. Get any kind you like." I'll just have it delivered," I said, deciding to follow him. I had his phone on GPS, although he didn't know that.I actually didn't do it to spy on him per se, but he was pretty downcast when his mother died of cancer a. Last nightshe had ventured into one of the many gaming parlours and dropped nearlya thousand dollars on the poker machines. Of course she could affordthe money, but she was concerned that her gambling addiction wasreturning. She had rationalised playing the slot machines as a form ofamusement that did not involve interacting with others; but she wassmart enough to know a rationalisation from the truth.She stopped at a liquor store and bought a bottle of scotch and twopackets of cigarettes and. Soon, as the sun disappears, there is not a living soul wandering the familiar streets, aside from thieves and cut-throats that prowl the shadows and the darkened alleys. If one were to stop and listen, one would hear the random shouts of drunks from the open windows of nearby taverns; the smothered grunts of foolish men who wander too close to the concealing shadows and lose more than just their gold on this unfortunate night; the sound of shutters closing for the night as people get down to.